Me: "So when is your baby due?"
Str8 Edge Kid: "Anytime, but the due date isn't until the second week of June."
Me: "You didn't schedule a day? It seems like all the doctors like to schedule a day to induce people."
Str8 Edge Kid: "My wife doesn't want to be induced. She wants to do everything natural."
Me: "You could have the doctor strip her membrane. That doesn't involve any drugs."
Str8 Edge Kid: "Whatever that is, it sounds disgusting."
Me: "Everything about having kids is disgusting."
Str8 Edge Kid: "Yeah, everything except conceiving them."
Me: "Nope. That's disgusting too. Especially in your case."
Str8 Edge Kid: "..."
Me: "Did I just scar you for life?"
Str8 Edge Kid: "I think so. My wife is going to wonder why I never want to take my shirt off or do it with the lights on anymore."
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Tell Str8 Edge Kid that if his wife needs her boobs massaged to get the milk to come in that you know a guy . . .
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