Wednesday, April 15, 2009

Take her arms and hold her down and hold her down and hold her down

Me: "At the last job I was working on there was this cool Dodge Charger always parked in the parking lot; bright red with racing stripes and a hood scoop and fancy brakes. At first I thought it must belong to some snooty guy but later I found it that it belongs to this girl. This really big girl. This really big girl in a sporty red leather jacket.

And then at the bank where I'm working now there is this nice Ford Mustang that parks next to me everyday. And I finally saw the girl that drives it and she's kind of this squatty little blonde girl...

And I just sort of think... seems like...'s kind of weird..."

Then my wife realizes that her husband is about to demonstrate what an insensitive and shallow jerk he really is. She yells, "Noooooooooooooooooooooooo!" as if she can stop me from finishing.

Me: "It's weird that these mediocre girls are driving cars that are way sexier than they are."

And my wife's face is crushed like she can feel the pain those girls would be feeling if I had said that directly to them. I don't mean to sound like a jerk, but I would rather prefer a pretty girl in a crappy car. Like a flower on a withered branch. That's all. It's just an opinion.

And it probably applies the same to guys. Except I don't sit around thinking about how sexy guys may or may not be.

It's just something that's been on my mind.

It had to come out.

Don't worry. I like girls with sweet spirits, too.


flieswithoutwings said...

Maybe I should have said, "The cars look cooler than the girls do and they shouldn't make it so obvious to people."

Or maybe I'm a jerk any way you slice it.

Amber said...

hey it works the same way with guys, nothing sucks worse than seeing a kick-ass car and some ugly old man driving it

PsychDoctor said...

I think that is so true... :)

Native Minnow said...

It needed to be said.