Saturday, February 18, 2006

Public Restrooms

Yes, we could go on for hours and hours about people who go into restroom stalls and cut loose with a nonchalance that would make Fonzi seem more like Cornholio or about boogers or "musings" on the walls or strange eyes peeking between the gaps around the doors or standing too close to exposed gentlemen or the basic etiquette of not participating in conversation while someone is doing their business but those are all commonplace.

When I go into public restrooms I have some recurring thoughts that I thought I would share:

  • Once you wear your new shoes into a public restroom they are no longer new. It doesn't matter if you've only had them a few minutes. The "new" is gone.

  • In my late teens, someone pointed out to me that they always flush public toilets with their foot to avoid germs. That seems like it would spread MORE germs but, once you find out there is a certain percentage of people who flush with their foot, you virtually have no choice but to start flushing with your foot as well.

  • Why do so many establishments place their paper towel dispensers above elbow level? The water starts running down to your elbow and possibly your armpit depending on your height. And where do they find that toilet paper that is so hard to unroll?

  • "Touch as few things as possible" is a good philosophy.

    Smell ya later.

    Native Minnow said...

    You forgot to add that except for in the case of extreme emergency (e.g. explosive diarrhea) it is against bathroom etiquette to set up shop in a stall next to one that is already occupied.

    PsychoIntern said...

    And it is definitely NOT okay to look over at the guy next to you, glance down, and say, "Are you Howie's brogher?" :)

    My friend Trent was very upset one day in a public restroom because someone had torn down the divider between two urinals. He questioned, "I mean who does that kind of thing?"

    I personally like people who do the courtesy flush during No. 2 so it doesn't smell as bad (some guys need to flush 3 or 4 times). :)

    Chunga from 107.5 The End used to talk about an old man that walked into a bathroom, dropped his pants around his ankles and proceeded to use the urinal. When someone stared, or made a comment, he gruffly replied, "I've been doing it this way my whole life and don't see a need to change." :)

    Bathroom humor is fun...

    Alpha said...

    This reminds of me of my old co-worker....she definitely needed to learn the courtesy flush. Sometimes aerosol is just not enough......