I got home from work today and my son and a couple of his friends were playing video games. His friends looked up at me when I walked in the door and one of them said, "Uh oh. Your dad's home."
I said, "Yep. You'd better be scared. I spank every kid in the house every time I get home from work. That's my policy."
The friend said, "But I'm a GUEST!"
I said, "That means you get it first."