Monday, May 01, 2006

I Don't Need No Leather Jacket, I'm Warm When I'm With You

Today was my wife's uncle's birthday so we went to eat some cake with him. He's a nice guy who doesn't have any kids. He's old and bald but still seems like a kid himself.

At the company where he works, the top sales-person gets to take home the company Hummer (H2) every month. He has taken it home a few times. He decided it would be cool to bring it to the cake party. Not to show off, more like the way he will show up to a Christmas party with an X-Box and say "Who wants to play?" He just kind of likes to share new gadgets and such and have fun.

After I ate some cake I went in the yard and was playing baseball with some boys. My wife came out of the house with the keys to the Hummer. She said, "I think Clyde really wants you to take it for a drive." Everyone else had taken it cruising around the neighborhood. I told my wife, "I'll do it but only if you come with me."

The gear shift looked like the throttle for a cruise ship. My wife said, "What are these things?" I said, "Those are the vents for the air conditioner." Hummer style! I was disappointed to find no controls to inflate/deflate the tires from the cab.

It was fancy. It had LCD screens in the headrests and DVD all over. The navigation system was cool but you can get that in any car. My head was nearly against the ceiling, it drove like a tank and I cringed at Clyde's tales of the $80 fill up at the gas pump. The mammoth size didn't seem to serve any reasonable purpose.

I'm happy with my Jeep Cherokee. It has headroom, power, a decent stereo and sheepskin seat covers from Costco. It gets double the mileage. My daughter frequently repeats the story of how I once picked her up from dance class and let her ride in the front seat without her booster chair. She says the Jeep is hers. Best of all: The Jeep is paid for. Now I know.


Native Minnow said...

It's got to cost even more than that now that gas is up to $3/gallon. I wonder what it's going to take for people to realize that fossil fuels are eventually going to run out, and that we ought to try and limit things like H2s so we can get the oil reserves to last a little longer while we figure something else out.

slimysculpin said...

Did you drive over anything bigfoot-style while you had the chance?

PsychoIntern said...

I was reading something about the Hydrogen cars...the process they currently use to split water to obtain hydrogen actually emits tons of greenhouse gases...Too bad they can't figure out cold fusion. :)

Sandskier said...

Gas is only 29 cents a gallon in Qatar but it doesn't make up for having to live there.

Gordon said...

It's always been my dream to have a job where I get hummers.