My Payolla

When I started my last job I still considered myself a young man with all my future before more. So naturally, I expected to start at the bottom, being crapped on regularly, and work up from there. I still feel young but I feel like I am passing through the door, so to speak. Not quite as young and I have higher needs. I don't expect riches but I would like to keep a shred of self-dignity.

You can be naive and view the world through that honey glaze of self-delusion but I would like to call it what it is, but that would take too many four letter words. So if you can't beat them, why not join them? Honesty and Integrity are terms that can be stretched and kneaded into any necessary shape these days. If you check the Help Wanted ads in the newspaper, over half of them are glorified pyramid schemes where the "employer" is looking for stooges to do his dirty work. Here's a tip: if the salary is given in weekly terms and you call to find they want to set up an immediate interview without any knowledge of your work history then IT IS A WASTE OF TIME.

In the meantime, I will go online and buy a couple of those PhDs and get "certification" as a minister and a Notary Public. Get my resume all lit up like a Christmas tree. I'm saying, if you are in an authoritative position as a city official or something, and you can land me a lucrative contract doing something like snow removal, spying on my neighbors, rigging elections, evicting people on Christmas, you know... the contemporary "honest, go get'em" jobs then I would be happy to "contribute" an envelope full of luandered money to your "campaign." God bless us, everyone.

I'm ready to get things done. Lead, follow or get out of the way. Let's get to work, America.